Pre-School and Tears (for mummy)

today makai went to pre-school for the very first time.

you can imagine my heartache in letting him go, the last time i looked he was still a baby in my arms.

my feelings towards this big day i have kept locked away so that makai wouldn't feel the same, only heavenly father really knows the pleading in my heart.

when i was little i would receive a fathers blessing of every school year/big event.

when i had children of my own i knew i wanted to keep this tradition.

i asked jevan to give makai a fathers blessing for his first day of pre-school.

he gave an amazing and heartfelt blessing.

my fears were gone and i knew that makai would be ok, all i felt now was tears that my baby was no so much my baby anymore but a little man about to take his first step without his mumma to watch over him.

this morning makai woke up, ate his breakfast, got dressed, brushed his teeth, put his shoes on and asked for his "pre-school bark pack (in his words)".

I wanted to cry right there, he was so excited about this new journey he was about to embark on and all i wanted to do was to, actually no its still an "is to" shelter him from the world.

he was right out the door with his back pack on telling me how excited he was to go to pre-school.

we got to The Discovery House and it was like he had been there all along.

He went straight and played with the toys, not even second guessing himself or not even having a glimpse back at me asking if it was ok.

my baby was a little man waiting to see what the world has to offer him.

when it was time to leave i asked for a kiss, which i got followed by a hug that quite personally i didn't want to let go from because i knew this was the beginning of his long journey. He ran over to the mat where the teacher marked the roll and he never looked back.

i'm so proud of you, my little makai.

i know you will do great things and accomplish so much.

but always remember how much I will always love you unconditionally.