A Lesson Learnt

let me tell you about today.

it was makai's first primary presentation.

i had this vision in my head of how today would go.

we would get their arrive early, he would walk reverently and sit on the stand,

he would sing proudly the songs that he has learnt, when his time came he would go to the microphone and repeat the sentence he has memorised and then sit back down reverently.

this could not be further from what happened.

we got there late, i had to pry him off his grandmother to take him to the stand, he wouldn't sit still, he turned around and started pretending to shoot people, he mimicked the chorister, their was no reverence, when it came to his turn to speak he refused to get up, when he eventually got up to the stand he head butted the microphone, stuck his tongue out and then said his line.

oh boy, it's always funny when it's not your kid doing it.

he was seriously crazy.

i have to be honest and say i wasn't really impressed with it at all.

i wanted to go up on that stand and take him down.

i wasn't proud, i was embarrassed that the crazy kid that couldn't sit still was my kid.

and then someone made a comment to me which changed my whole attitude.

a man from my ward walked past me and said

did you see makai after he had said his part, 

his eyes locked straight to you for you to give your approval on how he did.

my heart broke.

it didn't matter how irreverent he was being, it didn't matter that it took him until the end of the program to say his line.

it only mattered that he said it and that he sung all the parts of the songs that he knew.

in that moment i learnt that they will do things their own way and in their own time but they will always know that their mum is the most proudest person of them in whatever they do.

i am so grateful for makai and for the blessing he is in my life.

i know that he chose me to be his mum for a reason, he believed that i could guide him on the path back to his eternal home.

i have to admit i haven't done a great job at that so far, 

he has coped most of the brunt of my failures as i have come to learn what works best in raising children.

he is here to teach me patience, that's one thing i have said since he was a toddler.

this lesson will stay in  my heart forever.

and when my boys look at me for approval they will see a big smile on my face to let them know they are doing great.